It seems that a lot of people at St Bede’s are thinking about prayer this lent, and I really appreciate all the thoughts about prayer people have been posting on the blog. I was also really struck by the ideas in the readings on Sunday, about seeing and not seeing, about light, and about our ideas surrounding disability. This community always inspires me to think deeper and more complexly about my assumptions, and hopefully that prompts me to change my worldview for the better. I’m not sure I can put all the ideas that are swirling around in my head down on a blog post, so today, I’ll just stick with thinking about prayer.
Many of the posts on the blog have caused me to think about prayer, but a few stand out in particular. One is Andrew’s post about prayer and how we shouldn’t pray the way others like to pray, but we should pray in the best way for ourselves. Another has been Mohan’s post about how to listen for God, and Ethan’s post about empathy. These posts have helped me think about prayer as more of a relationship, and have made me realise how terrible I really am in conversations with God.
I do prayer a lot different than I do conversations with any other person. I talk much more about myself and my problems, I whine quite a lot more, and I talk a whole lot more. I have found that a prayer journal is not good for me because I end up using too many words. Instead, I have resolved to take more time to just be with God, to listen for God, and to find my own way of praying.